Like a Drop in a Pond...

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Proverbs 15:1

There is a particular cookie I bake that everyone seems to like, and I admit they're delicious: oatmeal, peanut butter, chocolate chips, mmmmmm. Since I've moved, I've visited my new local post office more than a few times so I could package them up and ship them out to my friends back home. It takes me a long time to tape up the boxes and pack the cookies with newspaper or bubble wrap so they don't get damaged in transit. The other day when I was done packing and taping up the cookies in the post office lobby, I went and stood in line to wait my turn for shipping.

The woman waiting in line in front of me was called up to the counter. When the postal worker smiled and asked her, "How can I help you today?" she didn't get very far into that question before the female customer unleashed a torrent of verbal abuse that made me cringe.

"How can you help me? Well let me tell you, you people here at the post office need to get it together! I mean, this is ridiculous! You've ruined my plans because of your ineptness and..." and on and on and on she went. I honestly thought she might pass out from a lack of oxygen to the brain because she wasn't stopping to take a breath. It was pure adrenaline running in that mouth, and all cylinders were fired up and ready to run over that poor postal worker like she was verbal roadkill.

The gist of what I heard was that the customer was upset because a friend had mailed out a package to her home, via express mail, and it was something she needed to arrive that very morning before she left on her trip to New York from Baltimore. The post office had erred and misdelivered the package to her friend's house. So, that morning the package had arrived right back at the place it had just been sent from the day before.

This woman wasn't going to leave until she received a refund in full, the package was delivered properly, or the postal worker, along with the rest of us, endured her hate speech. The postal worker apologized and tried to politely explain that, without a receipt, there was nothing she could do for the woman as far as a refund was concerned. She also informed the woman that she would be happy to help her in any way possible including giving her information on receiving a refund once the receipt was located. This woman wasn't having any of that. She continued berating the postal worker and lambasting the post office. Once I was called up to the counter for my turn, the poor guy trying to help me by entering in the shipping addresses for my packages couldn't even concentrate. The tirade going on next to us was sucking us both in as it was loaded with insults, threats, and a nearly John J. Rambo attitude.

It was amazing to see the transformation that this female customer's words had on the female postal worker trying to help her, the male postal worker trying to help me, their co-workers in the backroom who kept peeking their heads in the lobby just to make sure no one was actually going postal, and the customers standing in line behind me. In all, there were probably 8-9 people in the post office that afternoon getting an earful and becoming agitated.

The female postal worker finally just became exasperated under this customer's abuse, and her attitude completely changed. She went from sympathizing with the customer and trying to help her to just stating facts with cold authority:

1. No receipt, no refund.
2. There may have been an error on the part of the post office; without the package sitting in front of her for examination, however, there was no way to deduct that for certain.
3. The post office is a business organization; she, as a postal worker, is not the post office, nor did she have anything personally to do with delivering this woman's package incorrectly.
4. The customer could accept her help, or the customer could just continue to berate the postal worker and prolong the time she was wasting by continuing to complain.

The female customer finally got the message and left. The other people who where present to hear the abusive customer "set it off" on anyone wearing a postal uniform that day were gone, too. They had long since been waited on and scooted out the front door in a hurry to leave the oppressive atmosphere. I had the unfortunate pleasure of being stuck there under the abusive customer's umbrella of negativity; the guy waiting on me had to redo my packages more than once as he was focusing on his co-worker's situation, and probably thinking he might have to intercept a punch to her face.

I can guarantee the words of that one abusive customer ended up affecting more than the 8-9 people who heard her speak that day. Once the postal worker's attitude was altered by the verbal assault she experienced, she passed that onto the next customer. There was no smile to greet him, no "Good afternoon, welcome to the post office, how can I help you today?" There was a whole lot of sighing and frowning and looking at him like he was from another planet and didn't speak any language an earthling could understand. And that poor guy had no idea why he was being treated so badly because he didn't hear the customer she had to wait on before him. As a result, his attitude and demeanor also changed because he was thinking what's her deal? I didn't do anything! I just wanted to mail some letters, this is totally unfair! He left in a huff and headed back to his van where his wife, 4 kids, and their dog were waiting for him. I could see him pass along this newly acquired attitude from Hades onto them, too, and I thought oh wow, they're in for a real treat of a day with dear old dad!

This experience was a huge reminder for me to watch my tongue and clean up my attitude and speech.

Our words have the power to impact people far beyond what we can imagine. It is amazing to see the positive effects sincere, comforting, and encouraging words can have on other individuals, as well as the negative effects callous, tormenting, and discouraging words wreak on the universe.

Think of your words as drops in a pond; when one words drops, there is a small ring of water that envelops its impact with the water. Another ring forms, and then another ring, and then another, and each one grows in size and expands until it is no longer detectable on its way to reaching the shore. That one drop of water affects the entire pond with its impact.

Words have a ripple effect beyond your limited viewpoint and understanding. You can speak compassion, or you can speak cruelty. If you are able to create peace and happiness with your speech, why would you want to create frustration and sadness? Choose your words carefully, because you're impacting more than yourself with them.